Welcome to yet another Chase Joy Chanise series: Ms. 20 Something. I turned 20 years old the week I decided that I wanted to start a blog. I figured that I could do a series of consistent updates of all the new beginnings and endings that this decade will bring. Following the happenings of a young adult who has no choice but to wing all of life, should provide a good amount of content. So, here we are! And what is the question currently plaguing my 20-year-old mind you may ask – What can I actually stand to do for the rest of my life?

The Spiral

Funnily enough, I was typing a different draft about sticking to my current college major and realized I truly do not want to. The most immediate options in the work field within my major are so restrictive and unchanging that it makes my skin crawl. To me, life without variety is not living. A life where I could tell you with certainty exactly what I would be doing on any given day 8 months in advance is my personal hell. I understand that some people crave that level of routine and certainty and more power to them, but that life is not for me. Feeling like I would have no other choice than to subscribe to this way of life sent me spiraling. And yet, I kept this major for so long out of fear.

I have been dismissing the thought of changing majors for months now. I was doing this out of fear of leaving a financially secure field and others criticizing my decision. I have dissociated so far out from this current major that describing myself as a student feels inaccurate. Knowing that most people do change their major at some point does not rid me of the guilt that I feel. However, now that I am halfway through my college experience I have to make the change before sinking any deeper. 

The Decision

The main thing that has been holding me back all this time is a “lack” mindset. I’m more concerned with what I may have to live without instead of pursuing what I know will bring me joy. I am choosing passion over material gain, which has never been done in my family. I need to align with my passion, I need to take a chance on myself. I am shifting my perspective to view a brighter path and I am willing to commit to walking in the light. Even when factoring in the effects that virtual school has played into this, everything adds up to the same decision. Now that a decision has been made, actually getting these new course requirements together might turn into its very own post. 

Cheers to my first big decision since turning 20.

Nursing → English with a concentration in

Journalism and Professional Writing